Big Jack’s Rhymes: Another Game… Another Loss…

October 10, 2011 by Leave a Comment
I’ll tell you something that’s on the level
Tiger football has gone to the Devil.

Great Scott. Great Scott. I’ll say it twice.
We lost by 22 points to—of all people—Rice.

They hit us hard right off the bat.
We came out, as usual, very, very flat.

This can’t be true but here’s my call
I think they scored once when we had the ball.

Our defense played poorly, no, it was worse,
We seemed to be permanently stuck in reverse.

If I were to give the Tigers a grade, I have in mind,
An F-minus and that may be a little to kind.

Meanwhile back in Memphis they are of one accord,
The season is a bust and there is no drawing board.

But there is money to be made, easy as falling out of bed
Just bet that the other team covers the spread.

Written by Jack Eaton on 10/8/11. “Big” Jack can be heard every Friday at 8am on KWAM 990 alongside former County Commissioner John Willingham. He was recently inducted into the Tennessee Sports Hall of Fame.
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Big Jack’s Ryhmes: It’s not easy being a Tiger fan

October 5, 2011 by Leave a Comment

It’s not easy being a Tiger fan
Of course the team tries as hard as it can

But after watching them play here’s my call
A-The players just lack talent, first of all

B- Most tiger fans are loath to report
The coaching seems to come up just a tad short.

Put A and B together and the prognosis is bleak
The ingredients are there for a losing streak.

So what is there to do that hasn’t been done
Just say to heck with it and go back to square one.

It will be tough but here’s what they should do
Get rid of everyone and start anew.

Fresh faces and new ideas,that’s the route
Every thing is possible,there is no doubt.

And soon things will be neatly cut and dried
It works like a charm every time it’s tried.

The alternative is there but it is my contention
It does not merit even a casual mention.

Written by Jack Eaton on 10/4/11. “Big” Jack can be heard every Friday at 8am on KWAM 990 alongside former County Commissioner John Willingham. He was recently inducted into the Tennessee Sports Hall of Fame.

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Big Jack’s Rhymes: Vanderbilt 30, Ole Miss 7

September 18, 2011 by Leave a Comment

The Vandy game was loaded with misery and pain.
Rebel fans saw their team go down the drain.

The Ole Miss offense was like a gentle breeze
And their defense looked like a piece of Swiss cheese.

As one old rebel was heard to say,
“This is by far the saddest day.”

So looking back, hey, just who is to blame?
His name is Nutt and it’s a shame.

 

Written by Jack Eaton on 09/18/11. “Big” Jack can be heard every Friday at 8am on KWAM 990 alongside former County Commissioner John Willingham. He was recently inducted into the Tennessee Sports Hall of Fame.

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Big Jack’s Rhymes: Tigers and Red Wolves

September 9, 2011 by Leave a Comment

When the Tigers play in Jonesboro it’s always the same,
A knock-down drag out type of a game.

And it’ll be more intense this time for the simple reason,
Both teams will be looking for their first win of the season.

The odds makers think the U of M will be in a bind
With the Mississippi State loss in the back of their mind.

I don’t think so, in fact I have a hunch
The Tigers will land a sucker punch.

Many Memphis fans will make the case
That losing to the Red Wolves would be a disgrace.

The players feel the same so here’s what’s in store,
Arkansas State you had better bar the door.

Because the Tigers are in a combative mode
The word in simple: lock and load.

I’m so sure of a Tigers win it can now be said,
I won’t go to the game, I’ll take a nap instead.

P.S. My prediction for the game is Memphis 24, Arkansas State 17

 

Written by Jack Eaton on 9/4/11. “Big” Jack can be heard every Friday at 8am on KWAM 990 alongside former County Commissioner John Willingham. He was recently inducted into the Tennessee Sports Hall of Fame.

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Big Jack’s Rhymes: Ole Miss Athletics

September 8, 2011 by Leave a Comment

If one looks at the numbers it’s an easy call
Ole Miss athletics have hit the wall.

The basketball program is mediocre at best
And football has flunked most every test.

The loss to BYU really took the cake
The Rebels gave it away for heaven’s sake.

In placing the blame fans know where to stop
It begins and ends with the man at the top.

Coach Nutt is the man and he’d likely confess
That his tenure has not been fraught with success.

So if this season ends badly, we all know
That the time has come for Coach Nutt to go.

Some say don’t stop with the coach,what the heck
Why not get ‘em all, clear the deck.

But the most telling statistic so it seems to me…
They last won the conference back in ’63.

As an old play-by-play guy I’ll stand my ground
And hope Ole Miss can turn it around.

 

Written by Jack Eaton on 9/4/11. “Big” Jack can be heard every Friday at 8am on KWAM 990 alongside former County Commissioner John Willingham. He was recently inducted into the Tennessee Sports Hall of Fame.

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Big Jack’s Rhymes: Mississippi State 59, Memphis 14

September 3, 2011 by Leave a Comment

As I watched the game I said, “Great Caesar’s ghost,
The Tigers football program is toast.”

The offense spent it’s time sputtering and stewing.
I’m not really sure they knew what they were doing.

The defense was worse because, all the while,
The Bulldogs gained about a third of a mile.

Mississippi State, simply put, just had their way
And I’m glad I wasn’t doin’ the play-by-play.

There is an answer out there somewhere, golly gee.
But for heavens sake don’t look at me .

R.C. and the coach are of one accord.
It’s back to that well known drawing board.

There have been a lot of foul ups along the way
So here and now let me say,

Disaster is imminent it’s looming large
So why not try someone else in charge.

If that doesn’t work-from where I sit
The only thing left to do is quit.

 

Written by Jack Eaton on 9/2/11.  “Big” Jack can be heard every Friday at 8am on KWAM 990 alongside former County Commissioner John Willingham. He was recently inducted into the Tennessee Sports Hall of Fame.

Photo by JD Meredith.

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Big Jack’s Rhymes: Where Have You Gone Tiger Football?

August 31, 2011 by Leave a Comment

I can remember the days when Tiger Football made us proud.
We’d go to the Liberty Bowl and join the crowd.

And with guys like Vollmer and Fletcher and Harry Schuh,
Guys who knew darn well what to do…

We’d sing, Go Tigers Go, and ya wanna know what?
We’d watch as they kicked some serious butt.

They’d play like crazy because what he heck
If they didn’t coach Murphy would wring their neck.

When we played at Auburn our chances were really thin
But we came away with a 31 to 20 win.

And the next year here at home, if you want to know
I’m a son of a gun, we made it two in a row.

We beat Ole Miss and it wasn’t too late
To get a win over Florida State.

Ah the good ol’ days… memories to burn.
I have to wonder if they’ll ever return…

But like a poor ol’ coyote, howling at the moon,
I don’t think it will be any time soon…

 

Written by Jack Eaton on 8/30/11. “Big” Jack can be heard every Friday at 8am on KWAM 990 alongside former County Commissioner John Willingham. He was recently inducted into the Tennessee Sports Hall of Fame.

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Vintage Jack: A Red Sox Fan’s Meditation

February 2, 2011 by Leave a Comment

Oh Lord we can’t say for sure that this is true
But we think the Yankees made a pact with you know who.

With A-Rod in their line-up, you’ve gotta know
That they’re the equal of the ’27 Murders Row.

If they get a little pitching, who is to say
They won’t wrap up the pennant by Labor Day?

So to counter this, it is our contention
That we will need some divine intervention.

Now, we mean A-Rod no real harm,
But if temporarily you were to give him a scatter arm…

And it would be nice, really great,
If he had double vision when he came to home plate.

And for dead solid sure we would love
To see a big whole in that Golden Glove.

So that’s about it, nothing more to discuss,
If you’ll do that, you can leave the rest to us.

Written February 19, 2004

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Vintage Jack: Ode To A-Rod

January 20, 2011 by Leave a Comment

Texas shortstop Alex Rodriguez is, as of today,
One of the richest one percent in the USA.

That 252 million really gives me the willies,
Because he’s now worth more than the Philadelphia Phillies,

And if invested at ten percent, I think it’s true,
He could buy most of what is now Peru.

But AL pitchers say, “What the heck,
He can’t hit a baseball with a cashiers check.

And if he comes around with that millionaire’s strut
We’ll pitch high and inside and knock him on his butt.”

So now it’s up to A-Rod to move Heaven and Earth
And make sure the Rangers get their money’s worth.

But worth it or not, whether he’s a bum or a star,
A-Rod has forever raised the salary bar.

Written December 13, 2000

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Vintage Jack: Great Scott, Michael Jordan’s In Town

January 5, 2011 by Leave a Comment

I hope you’ll believe me when I say
I thought I wanted to see Michael play.

I love the guy; I’m his biggest fan.
What else can I say, he’s my man.

But on my way to the park I thought, “I’m a son of a gun.
Watching him play baseball won’t be any fun.”

On the basketball court he stands tall and proud,
Clearly above the rest of the crowd.

But on the baseball diamond, at least in my eyes,
He’s just another one of the guys.

I’m sorry he left the Bulls, but I’m not bitter,
Although I wish he were more than a .202 hitter.

Michael, I know you march to a different drummer,
And I hope you have a pleasant summer,

But get the heck out of Dodge when the season ends.
Hustle back to Chicago and make amends.

Because you and the Bulls must mightily strive,
Not for four in a row, but for four out of five.

Written May 31, 1994

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